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1.08.2013

Jerseylicious





This past weekend Kurt and I headed down to the dirty dirty...aka New Jersey, to see his family! I'm not sure if I've told you all this before, but Kurt doesn't live in smokestack New Jersey. He lives in the farmlands! And oooooh boy it is beautiful and such a great change from Boston. 

He's as Northern Jersey as you can get...but still about 45 minutes from NYC! I also love going down there to see the momma's boy in Kurt shine. Kurt has 2 sisters and 1 brother, but is clearly milking the momma's boy since he's the only one who lives out of state and doesn't get to see his family as often as the others. I love seeing his mom get so excited to make him a big breakfast, ask if she can do his laundry, make him a big steak dinner, etc. Love it!!



Did I mention Kurt's family has 3 ginormous German Shepherds? I think I've told you before. Anyway, 8 months ago they got the 3rd one, and he is literally a BEAST! Can you believe he is only 8 months? Oh and his name is Kraken!



One of the things that makes me really upset is the fact that Kurt's family lives 4 hours from my family. I wish we could go down there more often to see them, but 4 hours in a car weekly not only hurts gas money wise, but it makes my ass really big because I get so antsy in the car I just eat-eat-eat. For real though, for the sake of us whenever we have a family (AHEM...whenever...being the key word), it's going to be hard making sure both families see everyone!

Oh...before I go. I have to tell you about my friend Haley.
The heinous girl on the left is me...the one to my right is Haley!



We go waaay back. Elementary school days! Love this girl!

Anywho...she knows I blog

But a few months ago, she told me she was totally stalking all my friends blogs!

Which of course I thought was completely normal because I bet a lot of people "from the outside" stalk blogs! Well last week, while we were out drinking one night, I told her she should start her own blog.

AND SHE DID!!!

Show her some love! She's a hoot!


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1.04.2013

Awkward Conversations: Golden Showers and Edible Panties

I feel like life would be so boring if awkward things didn’t happen to people on a regular basis.

 Like when the fake Naked Cowboy made me grab his booty for a pic in New York City a few weeks ago

Last night while lying in bed 
Me: DAMNIT I missed my golden birthday!! 
Kurt: What’s a golden birthday? 
Me: When you turn the age of your birthday date. Like I turned 24 on July 24th of this year. It’ll never happen again 
Kurt: Well I’m sorry…I can give you a golden shower instead if you want

At work looking on Amazon 
Me showing a co-worker a makeup product: Have you seen this? 
:::Notices ‘edible panties’ in the more items to consider bar::: 
Co-worker: No….but what are those?
 :::Stealthily clicks out of Amazon:::

Interoffice chatting with a co-worker in London about a work assignment 
Me: Yes I can do that. Gimme a sex 
Person: LMAO 
Me: Sex* Sorry 
Me: SEC!!!**** 
Person: ROFL

I didn’t know adults used LMAO or ROFL, better yet in London. They’re so proper there! 

Anywho, it's the weekend. 
Let's get buck wild! 
I'm off to the Dirty Jersey to see Kurt's fam who I haven't seen in a month or two!
Have a fabulous weekend!

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1.02.2013

I refrained from riding a bull in a mini skirt

HAPPY NEW YEAR LOVES!!

I've sat here all day with fake eyelash glue stuck to my eye-lid and it FINALLY peeled off

YES!

Sissy and I! 

For the past 4 years or so, I've always gone out for New Years Eve with the same group of people! Friends from college! And each year, we always say it gets more and more epic. Well actually, 3 years ago might have been the most epic when Kurt was kicked out of a club and later found with dirt and mud all over his face and an 8 foot bouncer watching him....

This year, we decided to go to a classy establishment called The Liquor Store in Boston. It comes equipped with a mechanical bull and stripper poles. I went in expecting it to be TRASH CITY but it was seriously a blast! Plus, it was New Years Eve so we didn't give a hoot where we went as long as we could all ring in the New Year together and have an amazing time. Which...we did :-)

Toasting with mimosas! at 9pm not 9am ;-)

Shots of tequila were taken by some...me, on one hand, sipped mine ;-) Me+Shots=DEATH




Unfortunately, I did not take a camera out with me, but just used my iPhone instead. My sister had hers, and I don't even want to know what type of pics she took! Pure mess I know it haha

Everyone took a shot at the mechanical bull...except for my sister and I. We were the Ho'z wearing dresses/skirts, and felt that our badonks would be best covered. Especially since the sleazy men standing around the bull were having a field day watching the girls in short dresses show us their goods. Believe me...it was ENTERTAINING to watch haha. That bull was DEADLY looking....made my bull riding experience in Texas look tame ;-)

My friend Monica was a pro!! ;-)


Around 11pm, as I thought about it, I realized this was Kurt and I's 7th New Years Eve spent together. Holy Bajeezus!! Unfortunately at midnight he wasn't on one knee asking me to be his wifey. After drinking 8 jager and red bulls, he was in another dimension. But then again, my friends and I apparently were as well...

 
This was about the time I went to swing around the pole
Did I mention we had a stripper pole our senior year of college?
WITH an instruction video? ha!

As midnight approached, I looked around and saw SO MUCH LOVE! I had my Kurty bear, all my friends, my sister and her boy, and was just so thankful! 2013 is going to be an amazing year I can already tell.

Here's to another fabulous year!!!


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